Well, considering it’s an all or nothing thing, I’d fail. I only answered one question yes; number 35. I have one novel that this applies to except it’s not really transported but more like walked into. No time warp involved.

Would help if you knew what I was talking about, huh? The Fantasy Novelist’s Exam was designed to weed out the fakers in the fantasy writing genre, or the desperate cling-ons that wouldn’t know originality if it beat them with their own book. Of course, it takes the cliches to a bit of an extreme since, really, it’s not all bad to have a portal to another world or an artifact that could either annihilate or save all mankind (or both) in your novel. It’s all in the execution of the work, as you all know. The better writers will make us forget that what we’re really reading is the same old, same old.

So if you’re writing a fantasy book, go take a gander at that exam. But like a Mary Sue Litmus Test, don’t take it as sacrosanct. This one’s a bit more funny and snarky than the litmus test and strikes at the very heart of cliches but it’s worth the look. While it is sardonic, hopefully it’ll help you recognize played out themes in fantasy, or at lead you by a finger-hooked nose in a different, non-standard direction.

Some of my favorite questions–

8. Does your novel contain a character whose sole purpose is to show up at random plot points and dispense information?

I could have used one of these during exams in college.

28. Is this the first book in a planned trilogy?

29. How about a quintet or a decalogue?

What happens if it’s not planned? Or your genre dictates at least a sequel? Do I get a pass?

30. Is your novel thicker than a New York City phone book?

So far it can’t prop open steel doors on recall.

35. Does your novel contain characters transported from the real world to a fantasy realm?

My downfall. Damn and blast!

56. Does anybody in your novel fight for two hours straight in full plate armor, then ride a horse for four hours, then delicately make love to a willing barmaid all in the same day?

Why can’t I find a guy with that kind of stamina?

64. Do you really think it frequently takes more than one arrow in the chest to kill a man?

Has someone been making pin cushions again?

65. Do you not realize it takes hours to make a good stew, making it a poor choice for an “on the road” meal?

Well duh, they just tote around their microwaves . . .

74. Is your book basically a rip-off of The Lord of the Rings?

75. Read that question again and answer truthfully.

Since I’ve never read it, I couldn’t tell you.