With all of the accusations coming out about Harvey Weinstein it’s no surprise that people have some idiotic comments about the women who are making these accusations. Why didn’t they come out sooner? Why didn’t they tell anyone? Why did they allow it to happen? Keisha was chastised for these same things at her trial with Dr Luke by the judge herself. If it was really that bad she should have said something sooner.
Look. There’s no single look for an abused woman. There’s no one way to act. There’s no one way to fight back. There’s no one way to react. But society thinks there is. A woman must be an emotional mess but not TOO much of an emotional mess because then she’s just trying to get attention. She had to have not worn anything too revealing and not done anything untoward and not gone where she shouldn’t have and have made all the right decisions in order to be believed. Assuming she isn’t making accusations against anyone powerful because then she’s just an attention grabbing, money grubbing whore. Because the shit women go through when they accuse is the kind of attention we’re all looking for.
When you’re dealing with someone with such astronomical power over your livelihood and your career it’s really, really difficult to rock that boat, especially when you’re unsupported, and I don’t mean by loved ones. I mean by other women whom you know have suffered at his hand but aren’t willing to suffer the repercussions of pointing fingers. It’s every woman for herself and it’s sad, but I can’t say I blame them. Everyone can opine about the decisions they would make in such a situation but the reality is until you’re actually in that situation you have no idea what you would do and what you would risk to expose a wrong. If you even can because if you’re going to do that you better have proof or you’re done.
The fact that Weinstein has fallen is a good thing. It means that women’s voices are getting powerful enough for people to listen. To make them listen to us scream about how we’re not taking this anymore. We’re done. The world is no longer man’s to do with what he will and treat us how he pleases and we’re just to deal with it because “that’s how things are.”
Weinstein gave the lame excuse that he came of age in the 60s and 70s and things were different then. To which I say fuck you, Harvey. No meant the same thing then as it does now. A look of fear, or discomfort, was the same then as it is now. You just got away with it because who the fuck was going to stop you? Even if by some demented dream it was acceptable then, it’s not the 70s anymore. It’s 40 years later. Where the fuck have you been, asshole?
He was heard commenting about how he’ll be back in a year making blockbusters. And Hollywood has a bad habit of brushing sexual assault under the rug. Just look at Woody Allen and Roman Polanski. Not to mention it’s not called a casting couch because it’s in a waiting room. This is the same industry that black-listed Mel Gibson for his anti-semetic tirade. He hasn’t done much of anything in the recent decade since then. Yet Roman Polanski wins Oscars decades after the allegation against him. And don’t get me started on Michael Jackson. So Hollywood has a real bad habit of ignoring the shitty behavior of men because they make the right people money. But now the social landscape has shifted and Hollywood runs a real big risk of losing money because they’re covering up serial pussy grabbers. So they’re forced to act.
The thing is, these assholes need to stay down. Their careers need to be over. There are no comebacks from this. No cinematic masterpieces override decades of sexual abuse. They don’t cancel each other out. Directing an award-winning game of pretend isn’t a fair trade for serial rape and assault. So they need to stay down. They need to be destroyed. A message needs to be sent that this kind of behavior won’t be tolerated and there will be serious repercussions for those that take these kinds of abuses on women.
Men in other workplaces have gone to extremes in order to save their reputations, such as no holding one on one meetings with women or being alone with women anywhere for fear that something they do could trigger an allegation that would destroy their career. To that I would say don’t be a cunt, guys. It’s really not that hard to not make sexist jokes or just talk about a project or not touch your counterpart. It’s really not. It’s actually not okay to spit out all those misogynistic jokes to your male co-workers either because not everyone’s in the same dude bro boat as you and believe it or not there are guys who are just as uncomfortable with that kind of drunk frat boy high-fiving talk as women. Just remember you’re in a professional environment filled with mixed company. If you wouldn’t say it to a stranger, don’t say it to a co-worker. And if you would say it to a stranger then you’re on your own. I’ll enjoy watching you hoist yourself by your own petard because you can’t comport yourself like a put-together adult in public. You fucking idiot.
This isn’t about being politically correct or people being too sensitive. It’s about not being an asshole. The world isn’t your oyster anymore, white dudes. And I know it’s hard to relinquish control after so long, but if you don’t let go willingly, we’ll just rip it out of your hands. This kind of behavior was never acceptable, but society tolerated it. Now society is smarter and if you’re not getting smarter with it then you’ll be left behind shaking your fist on your porch and lamenting about how the “good ol’ days” are gone. They’re not gone. They’re just gone for you and we’re all the better for it. Now get used to hearing no and you damn well better understand what it means.